In High School I think I was completely confident with being an individual. I didn't want to be mainstream and was looking for ways to add pizzaz and spunk to my life, like have a picnic on top of a car. I have a photo of that somewhere. Now, I don't need to do that anymore, my kids have enough individuality and spontaneity to last me a lifetime. EVERYDAY or more like every hour I am dealing with stuff like this
or this
or this
and then some.
So when I make choices like home birth or do things like homeschool my son for Kindergarten it is not because I am seeking individuality. In fact I would love more than an anything to be able to blend in a little bit.
As far as our schooling decision is concerned I was just about in tears talking to my husband and wondering why I have to make everything so difficult. I told him I was ready to be the good suburban soccer mom and not have to fight anymore. He said "Well, you can't do that." and I said "Why not?" I expected him to say something about the family I come from, or how he won't let me, but what he said struck me. He said because you have conviction. It's true. Even my faith isn't all that popular now that I'm removed from the Bible belt, but it doesn't matter because those are my convictions.
I've talked with several women about homeschooling and got some great feed back. I started looking into a supplementary homeschool program in the area (I called it "subsidized in my last blog post, I need to edit that). In the end though, it was going to cost a lot of money and take a lot more restructuring just to have some regular peer interaction for Z if I homeschooled. I could just put Zion in Kindergarten for half the day and allow him to be with other kids (for free) and then the other half of the day I can teach him and do projects with him and just forget the label of grade level. One thing I have learned from all of this homeschool research is that it is less about testing and ranking, and more about the joy of learning. I am going to apply that to Z's education for the year. So in a way I am choosing both, although for all practical purposes Z is in public school and he is a kindergartener. We are actually about to head out right now to go inside his school for the first time and pick up the welcome pack.
One little disclaimer before I go. When I say I have convictions about how I raise my children, they are personal convictions. I am in no way implying that parents that do do things the more conventional way are not fighting for their kids. I think we all have our own battles. Most parents are just striving for what is best for their families individually and it's different for everyone. Whether it's homeschool, private school, deaf school, special ed, or private school I hope you all have the best school year ever!
3 comments:
I so understand that feeling that you're always making things "difficult", despite the fact you'd rather be happy just fitting in with everything else. But if you did it like everyone else, you wouldn't be happy because you do have those convictions. I'm the same way with things, like our plant-based diet especially. It does make things difficult sometimes, but you have to do what you think is the best thing for your kids.
I don't think you're coming across like your convictions are anyone's but your own. Just thought I'd let you know (as someone who didn't give birth at home or homeschool) that I have never felt as if you have judged me for doing things differently. I'm sorry that this has been so difficult, but I'm glad you've figured out a plan that works for y'all.
Hi there,
I have been wanting to post a comment and have even chatted to my hubs about your stories of your Z. We were both surprised that it isnt as easy as a child being evaluated first and then decide if he can skip K. As you may know my hubs has taught elem school for 21 yrs. He has always said that kids "catch up" or even out in 3rd grade. I DO know how you feel about your Z, knowing so much already that is in the K curriculum. I too have a Sept born child. He also knew a lot way before K grade. I too was concerned that he would be bored. It is true that there were kids who didnt know as much. But there were kids who knew as much as he did. I do recall exactly how I felt then, even though my sept son is now 12 going on 13. I really did worry. But I think there is a lot he got out of the school setting besides the school work. It meant a lot to him to have friends and get invited to some bday parties and interact with diff teachers. Plus he was our youngest and the other two were at the school so I knew I needed him in school , but I sure did wonder if it was right for him. It did turn out all right. I know he is your first born and it is very hard to picture that very very soon he will be older and this concern now will soon be way in the past. If he started out in 1st, a few years later there will be kids still knowing less and kids knowing more.
I told my 12 yr about your Z and I asked him if he could remember if he was bored or whatever in his K class. He remembers none of that.
Your thoughts of keeping on what you do with Z when you are with him is what really makes a difference in our children's lives. Hubs tells his 5th grade parents that reading to them is still important and family trips, etc.
Also, your school may have the opportunity in the 1st or 2nd grades to have Z do some subjects with a "gifted" teacher. If not in elem then maybe in middle school.
That being said, the 1/2 day K class would throw me for a loop too. They are all full day here.
On to your post here, I am the same way in that I choose to not do what everyone else seems to accept i.e. what doctors say. My kids may feel awkward when I have to tell dentists that we are not doing xrays as often as they say for example. I think it is an admirable trait to research and then decide.
--Michele R in Georgia
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