Body Image

This week I plan on talking about body image. It's something that affects pretty much all women and I have seen some stuff in the media recently that has gotten me riled up enough to want to blog about it.

Honestly, I didn't struggle that much with feeling insecure about my looks until I was out of High School. It's odd, I know, but somehow in my early adult years I got caught up in the struggle of yo-yo dieting, feelings of depression, and even a bout with over the counter weight loss pills. I have struggled with wanting to be what I saw on TV or in the magazines. I was comparing myself to others and of course always fell short. It got so bad that at one point I thought maybe I had body dysmorphic disorder. I hated my skin, my teeth, my eyes, my body (which you could break down into 20 sub categories). Most girls go through this phase and reach dangerously low body weight, but not me. I began to gain more and more weight. I would go on some kind of crash diet and exercise program and then hit a wall and binge like crazy. I turned to food a lot when I felt lonely and insecure. In the end I weighed about 35 pounds over my average healthy weight. Fortunately I was able to get some help through counseling. I didn't go to counseling for body image issues, but like they always say it is usually something else and in this case there was something else that was deeply wounding me and when I dealt with it many other areas of my life sort of fell into place. So I am very grateful for the healing that God has done in me and I am pleased to share that for the past 3 and a half years I would say that I am a completely different woman than I was back then. Of course I get down about the way I look sometimes, and feelings of insecurity do crop up, but I know who I am and have learned to find my true identity through Christ.

As far as where I am at right now, being pregnant is great because you have that special glow and having an expanding waist line is something to be proud of, but on the other hand the acne, stretch marks, and overall blah feeling is a bit of a hurdle when trying to feel good about yourself. I hope that this week will be encouraging, and if anyone is currently struggling with issues of poor body image or insecurity and wants to talk or share any prayer needs feel free to email me, themessymom@gmail.com. There is great liberty in overcoming that battle and I know the relief that comes when you do.